Friday, January 23, 2015

Porn Discovery

I was a normal teen.  I had a stack of magazines under my bed that I used to look at when I had alone time.  You know, the ones with the fold out pictures in the middle.
I also had a girlfriend that was pretty open sexually, but still as inexperienced as I was.

At times she would come over my house and spend some time in my room.  We typically did not do much in my room, since most of the times my parents were downstairs and we could not risk it.

One day I left her alone while I went down to get something to eat.  That is when she discovered my collection.  As I was walking back up the stairs I could hear her talking on the phone.  I had a separate line in my room that I once used as a connection for my computer.  Yes, I know, I was somewhat of a geek back then.

She was clearly upset and talking with her sister.  When I walked in, she had the stack of magazines in front of her and was flipping through it as she cried to her sister.

"They were under his bed," I heard her say.  "I don't know." She spoke to the voice on the other end.

I walked in and she quickly told her sister that she had to go and when she made eye contact she was crying.  I went over to her and asked her what she was doing.

She told me she found them and was upset that I would be looking at the pictures and not at her.

I explained that I looked at the pictures when she was not around and that it had nothing to do with me not liking her.

She then point blank asked me if I masturbated to them.  I had never been confronted with this type of question from anyone at the time.  Masturbation was still that unspoken thing that all boys did.

I replied honestly and said, "Yes I do.  But it still does not mean that I do not care for you or think about you sexual."

She told me that is what her sister said.  Her sister told her that all guys masturbate, and that it really is no big deal.  As long as it is not some pictures of an old girlfriend then she should not be upset with me at all.

I walked over to her and told her if she wanted me to I would get rid of them.  She said she did and so I did what I had to do and put them in the garbage can out in the garage.

It was not long after that she told me she should not have reacted that way and that it was okay if I had some magazines to look at.

We went on to a crazy sexual relationship, although we never did watch porn or look at magazines together, but almost every crazy thing that I have done sexual I pretty much did with her.

I wonder why people react a particular way about porn.  I know my wife does not like it at all, she thinks it is gross.  I tend to watch porn and or look at pictures on a daily basis, it does not mean that I don't love my wife.  Actually for the most part I get turned on and typically it makes the sex that much better.

Like when my girlfriend was finally comfortable with the porn, she would come up to me and say that she wanted to try something she read somewhere or saw in a movie and we did and it was fantastic.

Of course I am writing this on a blog that is pretty much devoted to sex, but I still wonder why people react that way to something that can be extremely fun to participate in.  There are videos for couples that are not the crazy stuff that some of the extreme porn has become, and if my wife wanted to watch those I would be extremely happy.

To me, porn is a release, a way to explore my desires when my wife is not in the mood.  So what is truly wrong with watching a bit of porn?