Blue Eyed Bader

Breathing in, I calm body and mind. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is the only moment.                                -Thich Nhat Hanh I feel pretty emotional right now. Not in a bad way, just in an emotional way. Was watching some clips of an old program that I used to watch when I was younger and it brought back a flood of memories. So I spent some time going through music that I used to listen too and now I am thinking that I need to revisit some of my roots. Maybe a weekend of nostalgia or something like that. I know I can not relive the memories but having some of the old music and videos around will at least make me think about them again. I do find myself saying quite often that they don't make music like they used to or they don't make movies like they used to. Don't get me wrong there is a lot of good music out there now, even more so then the early 200...

In light of all these reports on child sexual abuse, I want to share something from my past that very few people know about. I am not even sure if I have ever told my wife about this, but this is a good opportunity to talk about it. Warning to those readers, this story talks essentially about child rape, so if its a sensitive issue for you please do not read any further. The details of what happened are very vague, it only happened once and it happened so quickly I can not remember everything. I believe I was in the fourth grade, I am trying to date some of the other things that happened at the time so I can remember exactly how old I was. We were playing with some friends over my neighbors house. The usually things a fourth grader would be doing, hide and seek, man hunt etc. There was an older boy that had been wandering around and watching us from the street. We just started to play another round of man hunt and I was the one that was it. So everyone ran and I closed my eyes. ...

Well today is my birthday.  Yes, believe it or not, I turn 40 today. I don't feel 40. I have been working very hard to get to where I am physically and mentally. Over the past few years I have changed a lot of my life to get to 40 feeling much better than I did at 20 and I think I accomplished that. The only thing that I get a little disappointed in is that I wish I was further along in my career. I see my friends from college and they are all completely successful, have great jobs and careers and are financially stable. However, I still struggle everyday. While I enjoy my career and I have a good job, I feel like I should be further up the ranks. The difference is that I decided to enjoy my life right after college. Made some choices that may not have been the best career choices but choices that I do not regret at all. Lets see. The year after college I moved out to California to become a lift operator at Squaw Valley. I skied everyday during the winter and went to the ...

Will you rub my back she said as I walked into the room getting ready for bed. As tired as I was I was not up to it but decided to be the good sport and help her out. It had been a long day for all of us and we all needed a little relaxation. So I started rubbing her back over her shirt, half-assed hoping that she would just say forget it and let me get to sleep. But for some reason I was not feeling all that tired and started to feel a bit horny. Of course it does not take me long to get hard but I was trying to not turn this into anything sexual since most of the time if I push too fast she backs away. I went on rubbing, this time a little better and more concentrated on her neck and shoulders. My hands began to pull her shirt slowly off the small of her back and I moved them under the fabric. I heard her say, "don't get any ideas," but I was being very careful and just continued to massage. My hands explored her back as I pulled her shirt up more and this ti...

My life feels like it is upside down right now. It is not a bad thing, but there is a lot of uncertainty with my job and where we live. We may be moving with the company but when and where is completely up in the air and we will not know until after the holidays. I am not complaining. I want to move, but it would be nice to know where I am going, and recently we found out that we may be staying longer with a new contract doing the same job that I was doing for the last seven years. Change is coming, and I am ready for it. I just want to have a better idea of how much is really going to change. Anyway, this is probably one of my favorite HNT pictures so far. I had fun trying to figure out how to take the picture without falling over. I have some outtakes that I will put in a new post. I hope you enjoy the picture, there will be more to come in the next few weeks. Happy HNT, visit Os  to see who else is participating on this wonderful Thursday.