Yesterday was a day of reconnecting.
The funny thing is that I have had some brief connections with my friend over these years but it was like things were back where they were before our lapse in communication.
I reconnected with a good friend through google and she asked me how everything was going with my wife. I answered quite honestly that things are good but we are distant.
While I have been pretty distant with this friend and I do not really know her other than online, we do have pretty good connection were able to continue our relationship where we left off.
That, however, is a lot harder to do with my wife.
The funny thing is that I have had some brief connections with my friend over these years but it was like things were back where they were before our lapse in communication.
With my wife, I have a harder time reconnecting, and we never had a lapse in communication in the literal sense.
Maybe that comes from living together for so long, that you lose what you found most interesting in this person and your conversations become stagnant. Our communication was never really that great but we did have a lot of common interests and enjoyed each others company.
These past few months I have attempted to rekindle our relationship on many levels and it has been working slowly but surely but there is still a huge gap between my wife and I. Sometimes I have no idea how to bridge the gap and we just go on our daily lives.
Sometimes I think that maybe I can be more romantic or more attentive to her needs but that just seems to backfire more often than not. Or my romance is misconstrued as me trying to have sex with her.
I don't want her to think that I am being romantic purely for my benefit. I want to try to bring our relationship back to the days where we had a lot of fun together and it was not just a task or chore to spend time together.
I would not say that we are in a rut, more so we are just having a hard time reconnecting, getting back to the times when we would not want to be anywhere else but with each other.
These past eight years have been tough on our relationship, tough on a lot of things in our life. Now we are living where we want to be and both seem to be on the right path career wise, so it is time to begin our relationship together again. Unfortunately I am not sure where to start.
Sometimes you just can't. People change. They grow, and evolve, and on that journey they choose different paths.
ReplyDeleteLife is short.
Find your happiness.
xoxo
~vk~